Rough Cut of Trailer, number one.

This is a first rough cut of my trailer. It is a very poor cut of it, as it has no editing, dialogue, over voice or sound effects added. All this will be added later. Baiscally I've captured and imported my footage and inserted it into final cut. I thought i would put my first cut up as it still has some potential. In comprising to (500) days of Summer it is no where near to the standards I want it as. My trailer needs more hyper cutting to make the audience feel the reality of the personal characters feelings. My shots in this first cut drag on for too long at the opening scenes. I need to either speed the shots up, or add a few more extra ones and cut to different parts. But i first want to introduce the two main characters in the film then move onto the storyline. I am going to re-take some of the shots in different locations and I'm going to edit some shots out as they are in appropriate. Also i don't think my shots flow very well and the beginning of other trailers i have researched, they all flow in the opening scene. At the moment it is lacking a lot and I have had some audience feedback and they have said they don't get the narrative of the story so this could be a problem. Using an over voice may overcome this problem as well as it will tell the narrative and hopefully make it all become clear. But adding more shots will help this also.